“I’m Drowning in Diet Coke” New Utahn’s Post is Hilarious

Our bodies are 70% Diet Coke.

And if you're not from Utah it can be disconcerting when you move here.

Most states get high on coffee like every other place in the world, but in Utah you get high on Diet Coke with some raspberry goop in there.

On Reddit the other day u/ranger939 posted this: (LINK TO FULL POST)

"I just moved to Utah and I think I accidentally joined a soda-based religion

I came here from California thinking I’d get mountains, snow, and maybe some fry sauce. What I didn’t expect was being spiritually attacked by 47 different dirty soda drive-thrus on every corner."

This is a common realization for new people. Everything is normal. Relax. But once you try one of those dirty sodas you'll be a junkie like the rest of us. One-thirty hits and you're clawing at your face and packing a bag.

u/ranger939 continued:

"Do I need to pledge allegiance to one? Is there an initiation ritual?? Help me understand before I pick the wrong one and get excommunicated."

I found this humorous.

And I think most people do pledge allegiance to one. Much like coffee drinkers pick Starbucks or Dutch Bros. or Peet's.

A lot of people say just go to Maverik. You can get regular soda there plus load up on some Bonfire chips and sunflower seeds.

I think I'm in that camp.

If you're new to Utah just know you can order regular soda at Swig or any of the other places you don't have to get the dirty stuff.